I have been criticized for not having seen several movies that seemingly “everyone has seen.” In college I caught up on a few movies like The Godfather 1 & 2, Citizen Kane, and Casablanca. The Godfather movies were good…Bloody as all get out, but good. The other movies? Blah. I didn’t see the big deal about Kane. He was born poor. Made himself rich as the expense of his life, love, and personal liberty and his dying words were about a freakin’ sled that brought him happiness as a kid. ‘Blanca? A pseudo-intoxicated Bogart runs from love and runs to gin. The only great part of the whole stupid movie was to hear the line made so famous, “Of all the gin joints in all the towns in all the world, she walks in on mine.”
Well, last night I embarked on a double-feature journey into a world of two more movies that I had not seen. The following will be a review of my first viewing of these two movie monsters.
Goonies – The first thing I notice is the kid that has the asthma, Mikey, is the same dude from Lord of the Rings. Over the next 80+ minutes I was slowly taken (and I do mean slowly) through a plot line that was about as deep as the kiddy pool and with acting that was just about as stellar…especially from Cory Feldman. While the story was so not believable, it was kitschy enough to pass the time with a smile on my face. I would like to go down the water slide thing…that was cool. And I will confess that I cringed a little when Mikey lifted the patch to reveal that One Eyed Willie indeed only had one eye socket. Overall, while I was entertained, I don’t believe I would spend the money to see it again.
E.T. – Enjoyable. Freaky, but enjoyable. I got the feeling that E.T.’s neck was a piece of PVC pipe wrapped in a rubbery silicone type material. The red light that would glow from the alien’s chest reminded of the Care Bears back in the day. “Care Bear…stare!” The older brother got on my nerves. I think he reminded me of my brother when we were little kids. (No offense there, cakehole. You’re different now.) Drew Barrymore was absolutely adorable. The plot was about as good as it could be. Spielberg did a great job with what he had at the time. A great change of pace from Star Wars IV and V. There could have been more character development. And since we never see the dad, why mention him other than to bring fake anguish to the mom (who seems to be a floozy at night and working single mom during the day). In the end, I’m glad that E.T. phoned home and his “peeps” came back to get him. It helped the movie end quicker. I would actually rent this movie again. I think there were some things that I might have missed that would’ve made it more interesting.
For both movies: Given the fact that the special effects these days are massively superior to what producers and movie makers had back in the 1970s and 1980s, they did a stellar job. Now, back to the 21st century. I wanna see Transformers.