Month: December 2007

Criminal

Dammit! I feel like a criminal!

I have always felt this way. I devote time and energy and…then a change. All that time! Where did it go? Was I lying when I said that I wanted to stay? I don’t think so, but it sure feels that way. To me, that is the way it looks. I mean, I’ve been asking for change, but now that the change is coming, I feel I have cheated those around me. Flat out disrespect of the loyalty entrusted to me. Especially with the timing of all of this.

Too, in my current situation, I have always felt like it was a stepping stone of sorts, but have, in the past, walked passed about 5 opportunities to make a little more money just because of the security that the current job offers. Now, with this new opportunity, it is with someone that I truly trust that has my best interests at heart…very much unlike the job with the Plumbing Company or any retail or restaurant job that I’ve taken. This new position will require much more but it also offers a bunch more than I ever thought of putting into a negotiation package for myself.

Still, I feel like I am a hypocrite while I walk around doing my filing, processing reports, and completing paperwork when I know that my time is limited. It brings out the brevity in life, you know? I still can’t help feeling like a secret spy or an undercover person that goes in and deceives everyone around until it’s time for the bust. I can’t even say when I’ll be clocking out for the last time due to a few pieces of info that are just up in the air.

My apologies to LS, GB, and the crew at SU in advance. Sorry that at some point I’ll end up leaving you high and dry (so to speak). Just know that this decision has given me peace about mine and my family’s future, but has brought me anxiety as for how this will leave you all in a bind.
I just wish I could work both jobs.

Anti-Claus

So the family (just mine…Lovely, Little Bear, and myself) are celebrating Christmas but not Santa Claus. Why? A few reasons…First, it is a relationship built on a lie. Secondly, it fosters hope that is later dashed to pieces. Lastly and most importantly, I feel it takes the focus off of the whole point of Christmas. Sure, giving is one point of Christmas, but in my opinion it doesn’t promote what Christ came to accomplish.

So here is a story about an experience we had this weekend while shopping for Christmas presents.

We were shopping for Little Bear’s presents on Sunday afternoon after church. We went to a local Kmart (or as my grandma says, “Kmarx”) to grab the last of the gifts. During our trek through the store, Little Bear let us know that she had a “dirty butt” and since it was the weekend I was on diaper duty. We walk across the store sans buggy trying to locate the restrooms only hoping that there would be a baby changing table or some other surface other than a pissed on floor to change my precious little girl. We finally get to the snack shack. The men’s room had no changing table and the women’s room was Out of Order. I asked if I could zip in and change her really quick. The ladies behind the counter grinned and blurted, “Surely!! Just keep tha der opum.” A quick minute later we are walking back out and the ladies are admiring the sweet girl that is my daughter. One of the ladies, who probably went to high school with Fred Flintstone, asked the question, “So, is Santa comin’ ta yer hauwse?” I looked at Little Bear and just smiled and said, “No ma’am, Santa won’t be coming to our house.” The two old white ladies looked at each other, one looking like, “Poor thing, I bet they can’t afferd no Chrismas.” The other looked at me like, “I bet hEz one dem peeples dat don’t eat no perk and don’t belive in Jesus. You know…dem Juice peeples.”

I grinned. They tried not to make faces or act like I took them off guard, but it was too late. The younger of the two elder ladies commented, “well, you have a beautiful little girl. Merry Christmas…or…Happy Holidays, which ever you celebrate.”

Very diplomatic, I thought. I just replayed the whole conversation when I sat down with my grandparents while they were talking about the Holy Ghost, and asked them to explain what they thought the Holy Ghost was. They think I am not saved now. You can’t help it when people have never been challenged in what they believe. I was simply trying to get to the heart of what they believe. They turned it into, well, he must be going to a church that don’t teach Jesus and God and the Holy Ghost. Not true, by the way.

Back to the store…

The fact is that if they had seen our buggy, they would have known that we had Christmas presents. Sure we didn’t have a massive pile of gifts, but we have some for Little Bear and some family.

I just wanted to sit down with them and chat about Christmas and why we don’t celebrate Santa Claus.

Maybe some day I will go back and take that time. Until then.

NO NO NO on HO HO HO!!!

Count’em..TWO!!!

Last night was fantastic. As soon as I finished up at work in the Loan Office, I took off to grab a bottle of water from the bookstore. I managed to convince myself that I needed a sharpie as well. So…as I was leaving the bookstore, I recognized someone. Who? Well, I’ll tell you in a few more minutes.

I gingerly walked over to the young man and asked, “Hey, could you do me a favor?”

Mystery person: “Uh, sure. What can I help you out with, man?”

Gingerly: “Would you sign my guitar?!?”

Mystery person: “Sure!!! I’d be glad to do that for you!”

We chatted a little bit about my guitar, the fact that mice don’t really grow on trees, he looks different in normal dress than in his Superman Suit, and if I was going to sell my guitar now that he had signed it.

I told him that I had absolutely no intentions of selling my guitar. Especially since he had signed it. I told him that I had to run and hated the fact that I would miss most of his concert, but that I would come up and check it out as soon as I finished teaching my guitar class. He thanked me for taking a minute, I did the same.

Who was it, you may ask??? DAVE BARNES!!!

Who’s Dave Barnes? What, you don’t know, Dave?

Well, he does have a lot of faces. Maybe you know Granny or Superman or Dahweed Barness.
Either way, the guy is fantastic, down to earth, and an all around funny guy.
So now that the Yamaha is signed, that makes both of my guitars autographed by famous people. the Yamaha is signed by Dave Barnes and the Epi Zephyr is signed by Benny Garcia. I’m two for two.
I either have to get another guitar to have signed or just start letting everyone sign the Yamaha.
Hmmm…..?

Welcome to the Clock!!

Today is an interesting one…

At work, things are a little laid back. Hell, there a lot laid back. So far no students fussing about anything or parents calling to harass us. No departmental disruptions from other departments. Just a good day to be at work. Sure there is plenty of work to do, but it isn’t in a tizzy with forty-three other things or people coming at you. Just one or two things at a time. In days passed, work has been more than intolerable. I haven’t entertained quitting, but I have thought about asking if I can come in a work from like 2 p.m. to about 9 p.m. just so I didn’t have to deal with the drama. I digress.

So this morning, for whatever reason, I have felt like speaking in an accent. Now, usually it is a British accent that I choose, but today is different. Today it is an actual person not a stereo-type. Who? The one…. The only…Sean Connery!!! Why? Crap, I don’t know. It just locked in on me today. Hunted me down like a dog in the wilderness. Hmm?

Anyway. I’ve been off-and-on with the accent. I’ve had a blast. I even called my mom and talked to her in the Sir Sean voice. Even my own mother didn’t understand why?!?!? Booooohoooo hooohoohoo
Well, today has definitely a work-a-holic day. Between the Birthday lunch for a co-worker and an hour for lunch…it’s been great!!!

Tomorrow will be Friday. The seventh of December. You know what that means???? National Remembrance of Pearl Harbor Day…shake a Veteran. Oh, no!! Shake their hand, or gently pat them on the back. Hell, maybe just say thanks, but be sure not to sneak up on them. Some of those guys and gals get a little shaken up so take it easy.

The Lack of Blogdom

No huge deal. I was so over-busy on Monday that all things stood in my way of blogging. It was much like the Black Knight in Monty Python’s Holy Grail movie. Except instead of me, King Arthur, King of the Britains, kicking some Black Knight booty by chopping off limbs, torso, and head, the Black Knight made more like Aniken Skywalker against the Sand people.

Work was so busy on Monday that it made me and my family, literally, sick. The good news is that before I was chained to the bed by my sickness (actually I was chained to a toilet) I managed to get the car to the repair shop for the last installment of repairs (Heaven Hopes). Now that we’re on the other side of that, I can breathe. No, wait?!? I can’t! Here he comes again!!!

Have at you!!!